Spinning.
August 13, 2010 | Category: I'm a Momma
My life is spinning. And I want it to stop, or at least slow down to a manageable pace.
Thing, events, people, have been set in motion; and there is not much I can do to stop it.
The evil lump in my throat, is back. It left momentarily, and it felt so good to be rid of it. I’m desperately trying to get back to that place. The place where I don’t pace around the room. The place where my brain isn’t shaking around in my head. A place where I feel calm, in control, and at peace with change.
A place where I don’t feel like I’m on a broken carnival ride. You know, the spinning kind that never stops.
My everyday coping mechanisms feel a bit broken, and I’m not sure how to deal.
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20 Responses to “Spinning.”
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Hi, I’m Emily.
August 13th, 2010 @ 3:59 pm
Friend, you have written my thoughts this very morning. Good to know I'm in good company ; )
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August 13th, 2010 @ 4:00 pm
Emily,
Long time blog reader.
I feel your pain. And from one momma to another, I give props to you for putting your real feelings out there. I think many of us have them.
Motherhood/marriage, etc. is the world's hardest job. I work full time and have two little ones. I look at my to do lists, then look around my house at what needs done and feel like I can't possibly get it all done, no matter how much time I have.
Be easy on yourself, sister. It's okay. Your feelings are valid, and the good thing is that you're acknowledging them. Sending a virtual hug to you, even though I am a total stranger. From one mother to another.
emily
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August 13th, 2010 @ 4:19 pm
Oh boy…I know that feeling…going through a bit of that myself. Big {hugs} and lots of prayers. Hoping you're able to stop (or at least slow down) the spin cycle.
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August 13th, 2010 @ 4:26 pm
I love you. I hate that you're feeling this way. I too know what it feels like to be losing control over everything.
Emily, you have three little ones, a working husband, a home to manage, a job, a dog, the list goes on… and on… no matter how much you sometimes feel like you're not in control, you're doing amazing.
It's effing hard. Period.
I am barely hanging on most days. My plate is overflowing and TONS of stuff gets pushed to the next day, and the next. I decided it's a fact of life. LOL
Maybe talking to someone? A doctor? Maybe speaking to someone – other than friends and family – who can discern if it's more than just feeling overwhelmed, maybe that will make you feel a little better?
I'm ALWAYS here for you. ALWAYS.
xx
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August 13th, 2010 @ 4:49 pm
ditto
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August 13th, 2010 @ 5:40 pm
I know how you feel. It may not be this exact moment, but I have felt that way too. It seems there is no answer until one day, it all calms and you can cope and you realize what it is you need to do (even if you tried it already!) and everything gets okay for a bit. ((hugs)) and prayers that you too will find yourself back in the groove soon.
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August 13th, 2010 @ 5:43 pm
I just want to hug you. Sometimes even though it's all we've dreamed of and wished for and it's wonderful and good, it's still hard. Wishing you (and all us moms) peace in the madness.
xo
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August 13th, 2010 @ 6:04 pm
Girl you need to get the happy pills, they are working for me anyway! I had the same feelings not so long ago. When I walked into the doc's office and when she asked how I was dealing with all that I had on my plate I just busted out bawling. Problem.
Maybe you've already got the pills, I don't know but if not then you should totally look into it. I am so much more mellow and it does not give me any weird side effects at all.
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August 13th, 2010 @ 6:40 pm
When I feel this way, I tell myself it will get better. I try not to do much and just get through it. I noticed I feel about 20x worse when I am premenstrual. This has only happenned since having my second child. I'm not sure what to do about it. I started taking St. johns wort, I'm not sure if this is helping, or just the fact that I feel like I'm doing something about it is making it a little better. Hang in there.
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August 13th, 2010 @ 7:08 pm
I am right there with ya on this one. I feel like my head has been spinning for the past few days too. Ugh.
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August 13th, 2010 @ 8:10 pm
My theme song lately has been The Fray's "Over My Head"…"everyone knows I'm in over my head"…
I feel ya, girl!
xoxo
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August 13th, 2010 @ 9:08 pm
When I feel this way it helps SO much to get a good fresh perspective.
Please go over here and see if it helps:)
http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/
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August 14th, 2010 @ 2:38 am
I hope we didn't add to your stress. I hate feeling out of control and it kills me that you feel this way. Love to you. Lots of it.
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August 14th, 2010 @ 3:10 am
I love this blog- relate to your thoughts. Thanks for sharing
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August 14th, 2010 @ 3:21 pm
Emily i know the spin cycle well. And I hate that it is all in the head. Be in chronic or temporary, it is a crappy place to be. Thanks for sharing–you are not alone. Thoughts and prayers go out to you (from me)today.
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August 14th, 2010 @ 11:17 pm
You are not alone….this is so what I am feeling today….wanting to run when I know it is not the best this, wanting to pray but feeling faraway from the MAN himself……
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August 15th, 2010 @ 11:13 pm
Oh, I hope the spinning stops. I hate those points in life where it feels like your world is just wildly out of control. Just take it easy, and try not to be too hard on yourself. Hugs.
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August 15th, 2010 @ 11:26 pm
You are not alone my friend. I just had a long shower, where I cried and I cried. I feel the same way right now. I have a great husband, son, home, and career but, there I always feel as things aren't right. I know it is me but, I don't know how to help me!
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August 15th, 2010 @ 11:37 pm
My third kid really took it out of me, and it has taken me a while to get back into the swing of things. You will get there, you are not alone, not even close! Keep talking, it will get better. It will!
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August 16th, 2010 @ 8:42 pm
Wish I knew the right words to make it better. Instead, all I've got are (((HUGS))) and the reassurance that you are not alone.
Praying it will get better soon!
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