Maybe then this would be managable

While getting my degree in Interior Design in my early 20s, I found out the hard way that I do not thrive under stressful situations. I honestly would rather have chronic surprise attack diarrhea than perpetual days filled with stress and anxiety.

Currently my bowels are working just fine, not that you asked.

I knew when I signed up for this move (I mean really, it’s a move, not a trip, and I’m slowly coming to terms with that), stuff would get stressful. I figured I would be OK, because I would quite everything and focus 100% on getting our family to Belgium.

As if live as I knew it pre-relocation would cease, day-to-day commitments would vanish, and everything that needed to get done would go smoothly and according to best laid plans.

Below is a whiny list similar in nature to a public display of surprise attack diarrhea. Please save yourself and your guaranteed eye-rolling and skip reading it. Long story short: I still want to move, but the process is proving harder on me that previously calculated.

Proceed at your own risk.

Look! It’s springtime in the city! Close the computer and go outside! THIS BLOG POST IS DUMB.

13984657395 7aa73ea8b7 Maybe then this would be managable

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We’re moving to Belgium in less than three months, but before then we have a lot of everyday life to squeeze into a 9 week window. A few things:

Relocating would be easier…if my sister wasn’t getting married (at my parents house) a few weeks before we leave. I’m feel like I can’t help out and be there for her like I really want to be because I’m preoccupied and very much self-serving right now. Heck, I’m even going to miss her Bachelorette party.  *But I am so excited for her to tie the knot I could pee. The timing is just not the best.*

Relocating would be easier…if I wasn’t trying to train for a half marathon through all of this. Isn’t moving across the globe marathon enough? Who’s stupid idea was this anyway? *Worth noting: I really want to run it, but am so excited for May 3rd to come and go, basically so I can get these training runs off my plate.*

Relocating would be easier…if Michael wasn’t traveling so much. *But I understand this is part of the deal, still hard though.*

Relocating would be easier…if the week before we leave (we literally will get back to Indy from this trip and fly to Belgium within a day) we weren’t going on a nonnegotiable extended family road trip across the country. *This trip has literally been planned for over two years, and I’m excited for the adventure, but again, the timing is a wee bit insane.*

Relocating would be easier…if I hadn’t just taken all 3 of my pets to the vet for their pre-relocation “well checkups”, and walked out with heartbreakingly grave health discoveries. *I am overly emotional about this, and honestly I think this sad new has been a real emotional tipping point. Moving on…*

Relocating would be easier…if we weren’t in the middle of selling the house and our two cars. *I know it must be done, but I truly do not understand people who buy and sell homes every few years. This shit is hard.*

Relocating would be easier…if I could skip going on our house finding trip to Belgium next month. Childcare is so, so, stupidly complicated when you have four kids. Once thought of as fun trip I totally just don’t want anything part of, and this is not me being dramatic (cue eye-rolling). For real, let me pick out the rental house out off internet. I’m a good visualizer of space from photos, and I cross my heart and hope to die I’ll be happy and never bitch once if I don’t like it.

Relocating would be easier…if my brain and body would let me sleep. *I’m living proof that lack of sleep can cause an influx of irrational emotions.*

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You got it, I’m in pretty rough shape. I find myself shutting down a lot, crawling into bed around 8pm, instead of tackling my to-do list. Basically the exact opposite of what I should be doing if I’m actively pursuing stress reduction.

And this isn’t a cry for help by any means. I made this mess, and I’ll find my way out of it, hopefully in about 3 months time.

I keep telling myself how fortunate I am to even be in this situation to give my family this life-changing experience. That this is the hardest part, and great reward lies ahead.

Eyes on the prize, folks.

Comments

comments

Comments

  1. I have no words of wisdom. Only that I love you, that you’re right this IS difficult, and that you will make it. *hugs*
    Cherie Lowe recently posted..5 Things You Should Know About Slaying the Debt Dragon

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  2. I don’t have any words of wisdom, either, but you’ll get through this craziness! Eventually! And it would be SO much harder to get through it if you had chronic surprise diarrhea, so there’s a small silver lining.
    Nichole recently posted..Introducing a new addition to our table: The Festival of Frozen Foods

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  3. While it is exciting to think about this family adventure I can imagine how overwhelming it all is. Sounds like your plate is pretty full besides getting ready for this move. I’m the same way, in that when there is too much going on I shut down and want to be in my pajamas in bed where I feel safe. Sending happy, relaxing thoughts your way! You have a lot to look forward to and in the end the details will get worked out one way or another.
    Amy recently posted..Relaxation Day Results

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  4. I wish I could step in and help you out – I know these emotions well, and I write this only so you know people going through this can survive it! Nice thing about it, if you get a chance to rest and think about it- it’s going to happen no matter what.

    I think I thought things had to happen in order to get an end result but soon found that… not so much. Even if you’re not ready, you’ll be ready enough. I had to put our house up for sale and pack and move while Jeff was already moved to the new location. I thought we had to sell our house first, but turns out, we moved anyway. It happened to be one of my best friend’s weddings the weekend we were moving. The last days in my house were spent at a hotel, and I would come home- in my bridesmaid dress to finish packing for the movers the very next morning!

    I thought the first week of not having a house to live in and also having to sign the kids up for their new schools (that were starting the next day) was going to be the end of me, but it surprisingly wasn’t the end. THEN after all that, we still didn’t sell our house and we found out we’d be moving again, across the country. Doing it all over again. You know the story! Anyway. House did sell, we did move (again) and all is so so so very well. I look back and don’t think I was a crazy person, but think how strong and awesome I was. And how un-boring this life is!! I still wish I could come and be of some help- Lord knows I ended up leaning on anyone and anything that could be leaned on. Looking forward to your view from the other side.

    Love you!
    Steph
    Stephanie Precourt recently posted..Ways to Listen to Your Mother and Consider Her Feelings

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  5. I cannot fathom your stress level. So much more than just packing and moving and selling a house. You’re leaving the COUNTRY. It’s not like you can come back if you forget something. That said, I have faith that this will all, somehow, fall into place and the journey will be glorious.
    Erin recently posted..What I Read Wednesday

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  6. No words of wisdom…can’t imagine handling all you are handling…but I do know you will get done the things you need to get done. You are strong. And soon(ish) you will be enjoying the fruits of all your labor. Wish I could go with you though! ;)
    chrisgharmon recently posted..in her own time

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